jokes

[cindy kurletopz]

18 yr old girl got pregnant, crying,
Mother says: Who was that crap?
Call him.
Half an hour later,a latest model limosine stops in front of their house & a mature grey hair in a vry expensive suit, steps out.
Man:Ur daughter has informed me the problem. However I can't marry her, but if a girl is born,I offer 2 stores,a villa & 2 millions.
If a boy born, then 2 factories & 5 millions but incase of miscarriage,
What do u suggest I do?"

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Mother:Try again sir!
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Two Australian businessmen in Brisbane were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new store.

As yet, the store wasn't ready, with no stock and only a few shelves set up.

One said to the other, 'I bet any minute now some idiot tourist is going to walk by, put his face to the window, and ask what we're selling.

No sooner were the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious Japanese tourist walked to the window, had a peek, and in a thick Japanese accent asked 'What you sell?'

One of the men replied sarcastically, 'We're selling ass-holes.'

Without skipping a beat, the Japanese man said, 'Ah so, you doing velly well, only two left!
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[cindy kurletopz]

After an emotional hug, Girl whispers to Boy:
"If you hug me once more like that, I will be yours forever"

Boy: Thanks for the warning!!!

[cindy kurletopz]

Dokara: I Wana Tell U Smthing,

Dokari: Its Not Gud 2 Talk While Eating,
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(After Eating)

Dokari: Now Tell Me

Dokara : There Was A Cockroach In Ur Food

[cindy kurletopz]

Musharaf:Vry sory 2 hear abt d bomb blast in whitehouse at 8am
Obama:Nothing hpnd here
Mushf:wats d time dere?
Obma:7am
Mushf:sorry,call u later

[cindy kurletopz]

Two guys are sitting on a bar stool.
One starts to insult the other one.

He screams, "I slept with your mother!"

The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do.

The first again yells, "I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!"

The other says, "Go home dad you’re drunk."

[cindy kurletopz]

Roses are Red
I'm very Brave
This makes No sense
Microwave... -.-

[cindy kurletopz]

Wikipedia : i knw evrythng

Google : i hve evrythng

Facebook : i knw evrybody

Internet : widout me u all were nthng

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Electricity : aawazz niche.

[cindy kurletopz]

"I am looking for a Bank
that will let me loan
and
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leave me alone..

[cindy kurletopz]

Juan: wow!..gara ng relo mo pre ah...

Pedro: ah, ito ba?..napanalunan ko kanina sa karera pre!..

Juan: Hanep ah!..eh ilan ba kayo sa karera?

Pedro: tatlo pre..ako, yung may-ari, tapos yung pulis!..

[cindy kurletopz]

----Its More FUN in THE pHiLipPiNeS !!!!!
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*holdaFUN
*kidnaFUN
*carnaFUN
----at HIGIT sa lahaT !!!
>>>>kahiraFUN<<<<